Kapir. I had enough of them. (:

" When something fashionable gets popular and everybody is wearing it, ditch it. Do not follow trends. "
♥


Just because,
Mas

Yap.

Siaaa.
I'm unofficially, engaged.
Again. Aha (:

Muhammad Ezraf.
We met about 6 years ago. When we were 10.
At bowling. We weren't really close back then.
& he's closer to my sister than me?
Aha, maybe. Well, like 3 to 6 years ago.
About 2 years ago or so, my family went to his open house.
What I remember? I slept on his couch while he plays Play Station 2 with my sister. (x
We lost contact for 2 years. Right before we enter secondary school.

Then, he added me on facebook. & the only mutual friend of Aidil.
So I thought, this might just be another friend of his.
But when I look at the picture, I went like " Damn, he looks like this guy I used to know. "
Well, I didn't want to make sure cause his name is totally different on facebook.
After awhile, I found out he was the guy I thought he is.
Then we talked and chatted, till now. He's totally different now.
Taller too. But not yet, as tall as me. Maybe yet, maybe not. We don't know. (:
I hope he will be. He knows why.
♥


Just because,
Mas

Bestie.

There you go. One of the pictures taken on the 13th. (:

Meet Hazzique, my best friend.

We have alot of " one day " 's to do.

Some are accomplished. 

He's 16. I'm 14.

We can still understand each other, you see.

Just because,

Mas

Wait.

I think, I will be waiting. Till whenever.

Just because,
Mas

Its been awhile since we met, so I don't know.
Maybe I am falling. But its too soon, to fall in love again.
But I am. I'm just not sure.

Just because,
Mas.

13th of december, 2010. A day to remember.

Its not a new beginning.

Its not another ending. Its just a new beginning.

I'm turning over a new leaf. I just want a happy life. 

A life that isn't full of,

depression and pain.

Another guy might, steal my heart again.

But, I better be careful, the next time.

Why? Because I had enough.

Just because,

Mas

Its all about growing up.

while i grow up,
help never show up.
i learned to show no pain,
in the end i get fed up.
i learned to hold them up,
socialize with pain and trust.
now can you pretend,
the world is alright.
half of us are warm
others sleep through cold night
half of us in darkness,
while half in sunlight
the only thing  in common is,
we all fight.

i love you, no i dont.
at least i used to, you aint showing.
it feels so wrong, but I feel so right.
i know you're gone, now so am i.
its time i choose,
our Love's a Lie

here's my lesson,
life is lethal.
why i help others,
when they never helping me?
i got problems hard to solve,
but i got myself on my feet.
learned life aint fair,
asking why i dont cheat?
but i believe while its bleeding,
i sweep it off my feet.

this is how i grow up
dropped with all the stress
stacking and compress
14 year old depress
scars all over my chest
heart torn out this mess

just because,
anonymous.

Goodbye to another relationship.

I'm sorry I had to do it.
I didn't want to.
Its for the best. We both know it.
I still love you no matter what. As a best friend.
I love you Dad. Andrew.

Just because,
Mas

5 days, GO FASTER.

Have a safe trip.

Put all the blame on me.

Don't worry. Its not like I have any feelings.

If you can even remember,

I was the pessimist, the one who people call emotional, the one who's always depressed.

Not you.

Pain is in my blood.

& I'm proud of it. It makes me live in reality.

I don't use depression as a reason for me to suicide.

You want to do it not because of anyone else.

Its because of you, yourself.

I tried stopping arguements and shit.

But you keep going on and on and on.

Why do I look like I don't care?

Because you lost faith in me.

If you still trust me,

you will automatically that I do care.

No trust, No love. Baby thats how it goes.

Relationships, is not the main reason I'm depressed.

Its a small part of it.

Maybe, you just don't remember.

Or you don't care.

Thanks for loving me and trusting me before.

I realized that was in the past category.

So please, don't let me live in a lie.

I know you'll be reading this.

You might get pissed.

but really, I don't care if you do.

Because atleast I'm honest enough to tell you all of these.

& you, you never stopped accusing me.

Thank you for that. It'll help me in the future.

Goodbye. 

No doubt. I'm going to miss you guys.